Feedback and Suggestions on Current Piece
3yr
Elias Lemus
Not sure where to post this.. but im just looking for any feedback on my IN PROGRESS digital piece. The idea is a dude with war paint diving onto an enemy. Just wanna here some feedack to improve it and make it the best it can be. Color ideas, alterations, additions, etc.. It's not a "finished" drawing so there is refining to do but technical feedback is welcome too. Thanks in advance!
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Yiming Wu
It looks alright to me in the first sight... the main "weird" thing might be the shoulder in front (on the left side of the image). Looks like you are drawing "inside" the canvas, so that shoulder feels cramped. It should probably be _a lot_ wider to the left and the chest should be reasonably thicker as well. Otherwise it looks good enough. If we are talking about painting, then the value separation might be an issue as you have basically a back-lit situation, so the tree shapes could get mixed up with the characters. So you might want to develop the value distribution before going in.
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Elias Lemus
You're totally right about the shoulder.. thank you! And yes, ill be working out the values before I start. Just wanted to get some feedback on the initial idea. Thank you!
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Alec Brubaker
I agree with the others that the falling pose is a bit stiff. N.C. Wyeth was big on 'acting out' and character he was illustrating to really get a feel for what they would look like doing their thing, and It's a great idea to try it. Really imagine yourself as this guy jumping at this enemy. What would your body be doing? How would the weight be shifting as you fall through the air? Would your weapon be in one hand, or both? And do the same for the orc guy as well! Does he hear a rustling in the trees behind him? Does he smell danger in the air? Acting out the scene like this can really help you channel the nuances into your characters. Aside from that, I'd also suggest that you do a couple iterations of your illustration where you try out different choices on each of the characters' poses, the angle the camera is viewing the scene at, shape of the tree canopy, etc. You could even play with the shape of the canvas, maybe the scene would look cooler if you pushed it vertically or horizontally
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Elias Lemus
Thank you so very much! I started to try acting out the poses and it really does help. Thank you for all your great feedback
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@leximichelle
I LOVE your composition. As Jean-Francois said, the falling character does feel rather stiff and almost robotic. Maybe try a few gestures of falling characters to get a feel for what the limbs would do and what "falls first," if that makes sense. Jean also mentioned that the eye isn't really drawn towards anything else in the image besides the two characters. Personally, I don't find anything wrong with it, but if it concerns you, I might try adding some falling leaves or small animals like birds or squirrels or maybe one of them set some sort of trap for the other in a tree that would be visible in the background, All in all, I think you're off to a great start.
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Elias Lemus
Thank you! You both make a good point about the stiffness in the falling pose. I'll address that and the other comments as well!
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Jean-François (Jeff) Durix
Nice sketch and I like very much the bottom to top view. I have two comments 1. the composition is too much around the vertical central axis of the image. The eye comes in from the top centre and goes directly out at the centre bottom. No encouragement to go around the rest of the picture. IIt kind of feels stiff... maybe changing the angle of view to drive the viewers’ eye from top right to bottom left and have a few eye catching details, or playing with sharpness would help guide the viewer around your picture 2. Linked to the previous one, the diving character’s gesture is very stiff, symmetric. It feels as if he would be in a free fall more than in a diving position from the surrounding trees. I would try to bring dynamism to his gesture, break the symmetry
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Elias Lemus
Thank you very much! Both great points to be considered.
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